|
"Prime
Warden, Wardens, My Lords, Sheriff,
Ladies and
Gentlemen,
Bonsoir tout
le monde!
(Thank you
James for those “creative” words of introduction.) And
congratulations to you, Tim Taylor, my long time pal and partner
in crime, for your hilarious recitation of Marriott Edgar’s poem
about Noah and Sam Oglethwaite. I hadn’t realized that Noah was
a Lancashireman, or that the Great Flood actually took place
here in England!
What a
splendid occasion this is! I am truly honoured and delighted to
be here to enjoy with you this gala dinner marking my dear
friend Richard John Sayer’s installation as Prime Warden of the
Worshipful Company of Shipwrights (a Society which I understand
dates back to the mid-twelfth century. Some 700 plus years
before Canada was created close to 800 years before I was
born). It is a real tribute to him that you are here in such
numbers. Richard, you look dashing in your Prime Warden’s
livery and related regalia.
Ladies
and Gentlemen, I confess to being intimidated by the very
special and unfamiliar circumstances I find myself in at this
glittering ceremony, given that I am but an unsophisticated
colonial from la belle province de Québec. This is surely the
kind of situation the late Ethel Barrymore was thinking of when
she said: “Speech-making is exactly like childbirth. You will
be so glad to get it over with.”
Seriously
though, I am pleased to be back here in London – it’s a city I
genuinely love. At noon today, I ventured forth from The
Barbican for a walk and a spot of lunch. Near Finsbury Square,
I came upon an intimate little restaurant and went in. Lo and
behold, moments after I was seated, in came your Prime Minister,
Tony Blair, with his wife Cherie, fresh from electioneering in
the City, or should I say continuing their desperate search for
weapons of mass destruction. Soon, I overheard the waitress
welcoming them and describing the luncheon specials. We have a
lovely Chicken Amandine and some very fresh Sea Bass on a bed of
oriental vegetable rice. “The chicken sounds nice, I’ll have
that,” said Cherie. “Good choice,” said the waitress, “and the
vegetable?” “Oh, he’ll have the fish,” Cherie replied.
If you think
that is interesting, listen to this, my friends. As I was
finishing my soup, in came President George W. Bush with his
wife Laura to join the Blairs. Within moments, I could hear the
President excitedly telling the Prime Minister that he had just
returned from Rome where he had attended Pope John Paul the
Second’s funeral. “What a wonderful man he was, Tony. I met
him several times with his wife, Mrs. Pope. My father and I
were also very fond of his father, John Paul the First”.
The
Pope and Tony Blair were sitting together on a plane. The Pope
says: “would you like to hear a good Prime Minister Blair joke?”
and Blair says “but I AM Prime Minister Blair”. The Pope
murmured: “that’s okay, I’ll tell it slowly.”
Ladies and
Gentlemen, the real reason I have come some 3500 miles from
Canada is to explore with you whether or not our mutual friend
Sayer can “cut it” as Prime Warden of the Worshipful Company of
Shipwrights for the next twelve months. Your Company’s ancient
heritage and its historical linkage with the Old Testament tale
of Noah’s Ark is of much interest and provides a lovely,
light-hearted theme for this evening’s banter, as so brilliantly
kicked off by Tim Taylor. The Ark is a symbol of the church. I
kind of wondered about your Company’s close association with the
church – then I remembered that shipping and marine people used
to spend the first six days of every week sowing their wild oats
and then they would go to church on Sunday and pray for crop
failure. We are guided tonight by your bold motto: “Within the
Ark, Safe Forever.” Our challenge is to determine whether the
Worshipful Company of Shipwrights and its members can remain
“Safe within the Ark” during Richard’s tenure as Prime Warden.
At first blush, the answer would appear to be “YES”, but upon
further investigation, I regret to say there is a modicum of
doubt that “the Boy” can measure up as a modern day Noah,
capable of setting and steering a steady course for the Ark and
protecting the Shipwrights from the threatening vagaries of
today’s turbulent world, which of course include violent
hurricanes, El Niño, tsunamis, earthquakes, (Asian carp) and
other such disasters. Climate change is so profound and
unpredictable these days that there conceivably could even be a
Great Modern Flood! The Ark must be fully seaworthy, ready for
sea with a qualified and sober Captain at the helm.
Your new
Prime Warden’s name stands up very well to analysis and
gets us off to an excellent start. “Sayer” is a name which
comes from the Welsh meaning carpenter, very appropriate for a
Shipwright, whereas my research reveals that the name “Richard
John” connotes a strong leader with God-like qualities.
How appropriate as well! Unfortunately though, when we probe a
wee bit further, the news is not so good. It turns out that our
Hero hails from Essex… Yes, he is a full-blooded, fast and loose
Essex Boy with all that comes with the territory. I reckon,
Ladies and Gentlemen, you will know, better than me, whether or
not this is a good or bad thing!!!
The
Bible tells us that, after the Flood, God made a Covenant with
Noah never again to ravage the Earth and wipe out all living
beings. God then created the Rainbow as a symbol of this solemn
Covenant, and much legend and folk-lore has evolved over the
centuries about what might be found at the end of the Rainbow –
popular of course is the Pot of Gold theory. It is significant
for our purposes that “Rainbow” — in French — is Arc-en-Ciel.
Ark in the Sky. Apparantly God’s covenant was transcribed onto
stone tablets and placed in an Ark for safekeeping. Hence, the
long lost Ark of the Covenant.
Well,
our Essex boy has been chasing the Arc-en-Ciel ever since he was
a youngster (his private search for the Holy Grail). I have
learned that he has long been an imaginative dreamer with a
secret agenda of accumulating a vast fortune. In the British
Merchant Marine – where I served for 18 months as an Apprentice
back in the early fifties – they have an expression called
“Seeking the Golden Rivet!” The boatswain (“bosun”) sent me off
to find the golden rivet every day when I first joined my Ship
near Glasgow, Scotland. I always returned empty-handed from
this wild goose chase, to the mocking laughter of the bosun and
the rest of the crew. Could it be that Richard, in his quest
for the Pot of Gold might steer the Ark into unchartered waters
on a wild goose chase??
Richard’s early days in Essex were promising. He excelled at
cricket and hockey, and was also proficient at his studies at
Framlingham Boarding School. Legend has it that he also had
such an eye for the young ladies that he authored the first
edition of the Essex Girl Joke Book apologies to John Wielcham.
Of course, many of you here have admonished me strictly to avoid
sharing any of these little stories with you this evening!
When he was
just 18, our Essex Boy got lucky. It seems his father, John,
was a pal of Jack Griggs, the illustrious Senior Partner of Ince
& Co. You guessed it, dear friends, Richard leapfrogged over
all other applicants (at least 15 of them) for an Articled
Clerk’s job at Ince & Co. The rest is history. Our Boy went on
to great things at Ince and the record suggests he was the last
solicitor ever to make Senior Partner of a leading London law
firm without holding a University degree!
Some of
my spies indicate that Richard would have been well-advised to
curb his burning ambition to be a debonair homme d’affaires,
perhaps even a “London Greek” shipowner, by sticking to what he
knew best — the law, which he was brilliant at. But others have
whispered to me that our Boy is, in fact, a canny investor and
loves to take a wee punt from time to time! All I know is that
I have had many amusing and fun times with Richard plotting
investment strategies at his “personal” round table at
Pomegranates Restaurant in the West End. As a matter of fact, I
have a suspicion the Arc-en-Ciel ends somewhere near
Pomegranates!! There is a ever rumour Richard once suggested
changing the name of the restaurant to “Covenant Garden”.
On the
evidence so far, the results are mixed as to whether Richard is
fit to be Prime Warden of a respected City Livery Company. But
let us probe further.
Richard,
like Noah, has a penchant for pairs! In Noah’s story, the
animals came to the Ark two by two. It is much the same with
Richard. Let us see what we can learn. Mr. Sayer has a rapidly
growing menagerie of beastie twosomes at “Tilburys”, his country
estate in Hampshire:
Ø
Two donkeys
(or should I say jackasses?) Their names are “Prudence” and
“Georgina” — To call an ass by the same name as your wife takes
some gall, but also reveals confidence and security. At
Tilburys, there are also two mallard ducks, two sheep and a pair
of lambs (TODAY!).
As well,
Ø
Richard
claims to speak two languages. I have heard him speak French
and suggest the two languages are English and Franglais
Ø
He has two
fine sons, Matthew and James – here this evening
Ø
He acquired
a pair of lovely holiday Villas — one in La Manga, Spain, the
other in the South of France
Ø
He is a member
of two golf clubs: Liphook and Wisley
(N.B. Unlike me! Prestwick/Lord Wellesley story)
Ø
When rolling
dice he often rolls snake eyes
Ø
When playing
poker, Richard rarely does better than a pair of aces and is
more likely to draw a pair of deuces. Apparently, he is a
hapless gambler! In fact, there is much evidence that, like the
Shipwrights’ Patron Saint, Jude, Richard has a troubling
inclination to support lost or hopeless causes. Does this augur
well for the Charitable Fund and the Shipwrights’ Ark Appeal?
Ø
And rumour
has it that he gave the term “designated driver” a robust, new
meaning as a result of a pair of breathalized vehicular
exercises! The good news is he’s today a model of sobriety!
Ø
Finally, and
perhaps the determinative fact, Richard has an absolutely
divine, charming, intelligent and beautiful wife “Georgina”…
Dare I say she is Number Two?
Moving away
from the two by twos, there is more bad news. I am told that
Sayer tends to be tardy and sometimes he simply doesn’t show up
at all for important engagements. In some circles, they call
him “Jack”! Can you imagine the consequences if Noah had missed
the Ark?
As
well, Richard is becoming rather absent-minded as he gets on in
years. How many times has he forgotten where his car was
parked, where he left his mobile or what time an important
meeting will be called to order? I am mindful of this dear old
couple who kept forgetting things. They went to the family
doctor for a check-up and to determine what was wrong with
them. After examining them both, the doctor called the couple
into his office. “Look, he said. Your are both fine — in
excellent shape for people 85 and 86 years old. It is normal to
have memory lapses as you get older. The solution is to
concentrate more and take notes — lots of notes. Write things
down as a reminder!” Later that day, the couple was home
watching TV when the husband asked his wife to go make him a
bowl of ice cream, "with chocolate sauce.... and nuts too!"
The wife got up to go to the kitchen, but not before the husband
suggested that she write it down to remind her. "Do you
think I'm stupid?" she responded, "I'm not going to forget."
Moments later after much commotion in the kitchen, she emerged
with a plate of scrambled eggs and bacon. "See," said her
husband," I told you you should have written it down, you forgot
the toast!"
Richard has
a very keen eye and excellent hand-eye coordination, qualities
which would normally be invaluable in navigating the Ark. But
does he have the judgment, depth perception and knowledge of the
Rules of the Road adequate to exploit these fine talents?
Richard has been known repeatedly to miss the birds – he has
even shot (and sunk) decoys, forgetting his quarry must be
airborne! He once blurted out to his fellow shooting mates, “If
I keep missing like this, I’m likely to miss lunch and the
Cherry Heering!”
Well, my
Lords, Ladies and Gentlemen, how does Richard look so far? He
does seem to be rather amateurish, but I submit that the overall
picture is not so gloomy. After all, whilst a large team of
professionals built the Titanic, Noah, a sole amateur
shipwright, built the Ark. On the balance of probabilities,
Richard seems to have the capacity to learn from his mistakes
and he thrives on adversity. When the going gets tough, our Man
Richard gets going!
In
Québec, we have a lovely saying: “Il a beaucoup de cordes à son
arc” — “he has many strings to his bow.” There’s that Ark theme
again – yet another kind of Ark. If anyone has beaucoup de
cordes à son arc, surely it’s your new Prime Warden. To wit:
1.
He enjoyed a
brilliant career as an admiralty lawyer, internationally known
and respected (if not feared) as much by his opponents as by his
clients. (It is a measure of his consistency, stability,
integrity and leadership ability that he spent his entire legal
career at only one firm — ending up as Ince’s admired and much
loved Senior Partner.)
2.
Richard has
always been resourceful, diligent, hard-working and forward
looking. He has a well-deserved reputation for his positive
energy and relentless cheerleading for every endeavour he has
ever been involved with. (Although of mature years, he is aging
gracefully and remains young at heart, always applauding and
advancing the causes of the younger generation.)
3.
Richard is a
fun-loving and mercurial character and is blessed with a vast
range of talents, interests and hobbies. He is a cool jazz
buff, a witty and clever public speaker, and a talented and
keenly competitive athlete.
4.
He “chases rainbows” because he loves challenges and
is constantly seeking to change and improve the status quo to
make things better for the next generation. (I suspect the
Shipwrights Company will thrive under his leadership.)
5.
Richard recognizes the good fortune he has enjoyed in
life and has an enviable sense of “putting back” He is
public-spirited and generous and works tirelessly, “buck shee,”
for numerous eleemosynary causes. (Since retiring from Ince and
becoming the non-Executive Chair of Galbraith’s Shipbrokers, he
is in fact busier than ever before, mostly with pro bono
projects having a marine or maritime flavour.) As Chair of
Maritime London, he has become an engaging Ambassador for the
City and all its maritime industries and organizations …
including the Worshipful Company of Shipwrights.
6.
Finally, and
most important of all, Richard Sayer is a modest, self-effacing
and true gentleman with a most engaging “light touch”
personality. He loves people and is a true and loyal friend and
congenial companion to countless individuals, young and old,
rich and poor — folks from all walks of life.
Il a vraiment beaucoup
de cordes à son arc — un homme extraordinaire et vachement
sympathique.
And so,
Ladies and Gentlemen, I respectfully submit to you that Richard
John Sayer has all the makings of a perfect “Ark Angel” – in
sync with your Patron Saints Simon and Jude - to lead, nurture
and sustain the Worshipful Company of Shipwrights and all its
members — to keep you all safe within the Ark — not forever, but
during his term as Prime Warden. It is thus my great pleasure
to ask you please to be upstanding with glasses raised and join
me in a hearty toast to the Prime Warden of the Worshipful
Company of Shipwrights."
* * * * * * *
* * * * * * * * * * * *
|
